Monday, March 31, 2014

I Feel Witty, oh so Witty!

It's a rare occasion that I'm quick and witty on my feet. Most of the time if someone is playfully making fun of me, I respond with "shut up" because that's all that I can come up with. 

There is one particular moment from my past where I was actually pretty fast on my toes when it came to responding to an embarrassing situation. One of the houses I grew up in with my mom and then-step dad was a quaint little rancher that shared a driveway with a horse farm. The horse farm was located at the front of the driveway, so in the mornings when I would walk to the end of our driveway to wait for the bus, I would have to walk past the horse farm and the house. The people who lived on the farm were kind, sweet people and the husband had this British accent that I loved. 

One morning walking to the bus stop, I began to sing "I Feel Pretty". I'd like to point out at this point in time that I can't sing worth a damn but I do it nonetheless because who doesn't like to sing randomly? Anyway, as I was singing this over and over again on my little trek, the husband with the incredible British accent stepped out of the barn, with a look on his face that confirmed he heard every single off key note I belted out. 

I quickly recovered from this mortifying moment but saying to him, "just scaring the birds away" and walked on. I could hear him laughing as I crossed the street. 

That wasn't the last time he caught me mid-song by the way. The gorgeous dog you see in the picture above is my beloved Zima. Best dog that ever graced this Earth. 

Anyway, I let her outside, while I stayed inside and did dishes. We lived on a little over an acre of land that was surrounded by the horse farm and woods that backed up into a neighborhood. Zima was always really good about staying in our yard most of the time. One time, I couldn't see her so I started walking around the yard singing "Zima" in my most operatic voice possible. My neighbor was in the field next to me watching me make an ass out of myself. 

There was no witty recovery this time, no it was just "Zima get your butt inside" while I ran towards the house wondering if it's possible to avoid a neighbor for the rest of your life. 

Have you ever had a moment in your childhood where you look back now and think about how quick witted you were?